Can't believe it's finally the day before my surgery!! It's been an anxiety filled week waiting for Friday to come!! I've filled the week with errands to get completed before the surgery, a little sewing, and lots of time with family and friends!!
My Husband and son surprised me Tuesday night with a cake and presents to help me get theu the recuperation phase of this journey. I was all teary when they came in with the cake all lit up with candles!! I was very touched that they remembered and did it before my surgery!!
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Sunday, February 3, 2013
The countdown is on!!
Well, it's true!! I got hospital approval to transplant my islet cells into my renal capsule. My surgery has been scheduled for Friday, February 8, 2013 starting at 6:30AM. To steal a phrase from a friend who's had the surgery, I'm nervously excitied!!
I've only known since the 24th of January and I've gone through every emotion you can imagine!! Most especially, I have been second guessing my decision to have the surgery at all!! Is this too radical of a treatment strategy? Will I be able to withstand the immediate post op pain? What if I become diabetic? Is that a fair trade off? You name it and I've thought of the excuse not to have the surgery!! I'm trying to think of it not as a treatment but as a cure of my pancreatitis due to the removal of my pancreas! It can't get inflammed if it doesn't exist!!!
I was seriously considering cancelling the surgery until I spoke with anesthesia during my pre op evaluation. The doctor was extremely meticulous about the details of my history and very thorough in hids documentation. He recommended I see the acute pain management team the morning of my surgery to best treat my pain post op,my biggest fear!!! He sent an email to the director of the team outling my pain issues requesting an evaluation in the holding area of the surgical suite. As you can imagine, this allayed my biggest fears. He, also, very calmly answered my myriad of questions without becoming annoyed. We even joked about raising our boys in today's world. I felt very reassured by this doctor's demeanor and attention to detail, as well as his being proactive concerning my post op pain. I was blessed to get to meet with this particular doctor!!
Having had chronic pain, I have what's called hyperlagesia, which means any pain I do experience is heightened due to my central nervous system having been exposed to my chronic pain. Our central nervous systems are very adaptable. With hyperalgesia, if you and I both stub our toes, your body tells you you stubbed your toe but you can adapt and go about your day. My body tells me I broke my foot and my pain is overwhelming even from a small incident like stubbing my toe. I'm extremely worried about the pain post op being out of contol despite having learned to have a high pain tolerance. The anesthesiologist I saw understood this concept and reassured me the acute pain team would take actions to adequately treat my pain.
As I write this, I have 5 days until the surgery!! YIKES!!! But since speaking with anesthesia Friday, I am eerily calm concerning the upcoming surgery. I think I've come to accept it as the only viable option for treating my chronic pancreastitis. I cannot contiue to live the way I have the last 12 months, repeatedly being admitted for at least 5 or more days for acute abdominal pain. And depending on the medical team, I frequently have to fight to have my symptoms believed and treated adequately. I'm so tired of fighting for relief of my symptoms, most of all the pain! So, I have to take some action & this surgery feel right!
I feel I have little control over the surgical process that I am about to endure and I like to have some measure of control over things in my life. I like to be in the driver's seat making the decidions about which way to go. It seems since I made the decision to have the surgery and signed on the dotted line, this freight train has been moving along without much imput from me. I've been wracking my brain to think of some way to gain a little control over what is about to transpire. During the last few admissions, I have been very uncomfortable in the hospital garments that they have us patients wear and this got me to thinking. I'm an avid sewer with confidently average skills, so I decided to make my own PJ's to wear in the hospital as I'm recuperating. I'm of smaller stature, 5' 1" and 118 lbs, so the hospital garb is HUGE on me as well as being unflattering,and it shows much more skin in inappropriate areas than I like. I knew I could improve on these issues.
I've been working hard on creating my colorful, slightly tailored and fitted PJ's for the past couple of weeks. I have made 5 pairs of pants, complete with pockets and hemmed so I'm not tripping over the cuffs as I was with the hospital pants. I'm now working on 5 matching tops, complete with snaps and access to areas the nurses may need to get to while at the same time modestly covering what needs to be covered. (I'll include pictures before I get admitted.) I'm still working on the practice top and I know I only have 5 days to complete 5 tops, but once I make the first practice top, the rest will become easier to make as I go along. Practice makes perfect!!
The PJ's are very colorful and I think, really cute especially when compared to what the hospital has to offer us to wear. So, this has allowed me to think I have some control in an area of my upcoming experience. It also has kept me distracted from any pain I had been experiencing from the repeated flares as well as thinking about the upcoming surgery. So, making these PJ's has served a couple of important purposes.
I have one issue that I'm struggling with about Fridays surgery. I have a clotting disorder which means my body likes to make blood clots. To treat this I'm anticoagulated or in everyday terms, I'm on blood thinners, an injection I take every night before I go to bed. Part of the post op pain management is an epidural catheter, just like when a woman is in labor. But there is an issue I have to weigh before I can actually get one. I need to stop my antocoagulant Monday and be off of it all week to be able to get the epidural Friday. This means I am risking develoing a clot as the days I'm not taking it progress. I have been off of it in the past for shorter time periods and have developed clots, so 4 days without this clot preventing medicine scares me. What should I do!!!
My current options are 1)stopping the medicine Monday & risk developing a clot all week but be able to get the epidural Friday. or 2) don't stop the medicine until Thursday as needed just for the surgery and then I can't get the epidural Friday but I won't risk developing a clot. I'm torn as to what to do. If I develop a clot, the surgery will be cancelled until after the clot is stable. But when I develop clots, they generally go to my lungs which is very dangerous, so I'll be taking a huge risk should I decide to hold it all week. The key to making this decision is the ability of the acute pain management team in controlling my post op pain if I don't have an epidural. Right now, I'm leaning towards forgoing the epidural and not stopping my medicine. I don't feel comfortable risking a clot, especially one in my lungs as I get very sick when I do develop clots. But if I take that route, will I be able to withstand the pain after surgery?? What's a girl to do??
Well, this is where things stand today. I'll keep you updated as the week progresses and I weigh the anticoagulant dilemna in my mind. I have to go sew, so have a good wekk & we'll chat soon!!
Sandy
I've only known since the 24th of January and I've gone through every emotion you can imagine!! Most especially, I have been second guessing my decision to have the surgery at all!! Is this too radical of a treatment strategy? Will I be able to withstand the immediate post op pain? What if I become diabetic? Is that a fair trade off? You name it and I've thought of the excuse not to have the surgery!! I'm trying to think of it not as a treatment but as a cure of my pancreatitis due to the removal of my pancreas! It can't get inflammed if it doesn't exist!!!
I was seriously considering cancelling the surgery until I spoke with anesthesia during my pre op evaluation. The doctor was extremely meticulous about the details of my history and very thorough in hids documentation. He recommended I see the acute pain management team the morning of my surgery to best treat my pain post op,my biggest fear!!! He sent an email to the director of the team outling my pain issues requesting an evaluation in the holding area of the surgical suite. As you can imagine, this allayed my biggest fears. He, also, very calmly answered my myriad of questions without becoming annoyed. We even joked about raising our boys in today's world. I felt very reassured by this doctor's demeanor and attention to detail, as well as his being proactive concerning my post op pain. I was blessed to get to meet with this particular doctor!!
Having had chronic pain, I have what's called hyperlagesia, which means any pain I do experience is heightened due to my central nervous system having been exposed to my chronic pain. Our central nervous systems are very adaptable. With hyperalgesia, if you and I both stub our toes, your body tells you you stubbed your toe but you can adapt and go about your day. My body tells me I broke my foot and my pain is overwhelming even from a small incident like stubbing my toe. I'm extremely worried about the pain post op being out of contol despite having learned to have a high pain tolerance. The anesthesiologist I saw understood this concept and reassured me the acute pain team would take actions to adequately treat my pain.
As I write this, I have 5 days until the surgery!! YIKES!!! But since speaking with anesthesia Friday, I am eerily calm concerning the upcoming surgery. I think I've come to accept it as the only viable option for treating my chronic pancreastitis. I cannot contiue to live the way I have the last 12 months, repeatedly being admitted for at least 5 or more days for acute abdominal pain. And depending on the medical team, I frequently have to fight to have my symptoms believed and treated adequately. I'm so tired of fighting for relief of my symptoms, most of all the pain! So, I have to take some action & this surgery feel right!
I feel I have little control over the surgical process that I am about to endure and I like to have some measure of control over things in my life. I like to be in the driver's seat making the decidions about which way to go. It seems since I made the decision to have the surgery and signed on the dotted line, this freight train has been moving along without much imput from me. I've been wracking my brain to think of some way to gain a little control over what is about to transpire. During the last few admissions, I have been very uncomfortable in the hospital garments that they have us patients wear and this got me to thinking. I'm an avid sewer with confidently average skills, so I decided to make my own PJ's to wear in the hospital as I'm recuperating. I'm of smaller stature, 5' 1" and 118 lbs, so the hospital garb is HUGE on me as well as being unflattering,and it shows much more skin in inappropriate areas than I like. I knew I could improve on these issues.
I've been working hard on creating my colorful, slightly tailored and fitted PJ's for the past couple of weeks. I have made 5 pairs of pants, complete with pockets and hemmed so I'm not tripping over the cuffs as I was with the hospital pants. I'm now working on 5 matching tops, complete with snaps and access to areas the nurses may need to get to while at the same time modestly covering what needs to be covered. (I'll include pictures before I get admitted.) I'm still working on the practice top and I know I only have 5 days to complete 5 tops, but once I make the first practice top, the rest will become easier to make as I go along. Practice makes perfect!!
The PJ's are very colorful and I think, really cute especially when compared to what the hospital has to offer us to wear. So, this has allowed me to think I have some control in an area of my upcoming experience. It also has kept me distracted from any pain I had been experiencing from the repeated flares as well as thinking about the upcoming surgery. So, making these PJ's has served a couple of important purposes.
I have one issue that I'm struggling with about Fridays surgery. I have a clotting disorder which means my body likes to make blood clots. To treat this I'm anticoagulated or in everyday terms, I'm on blood thinners, an injection I take every night before I go to bed. Part of the post op pain management is an epidural catheter, just like when a woman is in labor. But there is an issue I have to weigh before I can actually get one. I need to stop my antocoagulant Monday and be off of it all week to be able to get the epidural Friday. This means I am risking develoing a clot as the days I'm not taking it progress. I have been off of it in the past for shorter time periods and have developed clots, so 4 days without this clot preventing medicine scares me. What should I do!!!
My current options are 1)stopping the medicine Monday & risk developing a clot all week but be able to get the epidural Friday. or 2) don't stop the medicine until Thursday as needed just for the surgery and then I can't get the epidural Friday but I won't risk developing a clot. I'm torn as to what to do. If I develop a clot, the surgery will be cancelled until after the clot is stable. But when I develop clots, they generally go to my lungs which is very dangerous, so I'll be taking a huge risk should I decide to hold it all week. The key to making this decision is the ability of the acute pain management team in controlling my post op pain if I don't have an epidural. Right now, I'm leaning towards forgoing the epidural and not stopping my medicine. I don't feel comfortable risking a clot, especially one in my lungs as I get very sick when I do develop clots. But if I take that route, will I be able to withstand the pain after surgery?? What's a girl to do??
Well, this is where things stand today. I'll keep you updated as the week progresses and I weigh the anticoagulant dilemna in my mind. I have to go sew, so have a good wekk & we'll chat soon!!
Sandy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)